In a world where your phone is both your therapist and your god, protection isn’t optional—it’s branding. This dual-layer case offers the illusion of security with a polycarbonate shell on the outside and a thermoplastic cushion on the inside. Kind of like capitalism.
MagSafe®-compatible, because obviously. How else will you pretend to recharge meaning?
Polycarbonate outer shell – like a suit of armor, but for memes
TPU inner liner – absorbs shock, not poor decisions
Dual-layer design, because one layer is for amateurs
Port openings so precise, they practically whisper “you’re welcome”
MagSafe® magnets included for secure attachment and moral alignment
Works with induction chargers, assuming you still believe in progress
Gloss or matte finish—choose your flavor of performative minimalism
Sourced from Korea, which sounds impressive unless you’re in Korea
Disclaimer:
Keep it away from high-alcohol liquids. We’re referring to both the phone case and your ex.
Avoid direct sunlight unless you want your phone case to slowly become an art project about decay.
Important:
This product cannot be shipped to South Korea, Hong Kong, Taiwan, Japan, or Singapore. We’re sure there’s a reason. Don’t ask us what it is.
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
⚠Warning: This product can expose you to chemicals, including Bisphenol A (BPA) which is known to the State of California to cause birth defects or other reproductive harm. For more information go to https://www.p65warnings.ca.gov
In a world where your phone is both your therapist and your god, protection isn’t optional—it’s branding. This dual-layer case offers the illusion of security with a polycarbonate shell on the outside and a thermoplastic cushion on the inside. Kind of like capitalism.
MagSafe®-compatible, because obviously. How else will you pretend to recharge meaning?
Polycarbonate outer shell – like a suit of armor, but for memes
TPU inner liner – absorbs shock, not poor decisions
Dual-layer design, because one layer is for amateurs
Port openings so precise, they practically whisper “you’re welcome”
MagSafe® magnets included for secure attachment and moral alignment
Works with induction chargers, assuming you still believe in progress
Gloss or matte finish—choose your flavor of performative minimalism
Sourced from Korea, which sounds impressive unless you’re in Korea
Disclaimer:
Keep it away from high-alcohol liquids. We’re referring to both the phone case and your ex.
Avoid direct sunlight unless you want your phone case to slowly become an art project about decay.
Important:
This product cannot be shipped to South Korea, Hong Kong, Taiwan, Japan, or Singapore. We’re sure there’s a reason. Don’t ask us what it is.
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
⚠Warning: This product can expose you to chemicals, including Bisphenol A (BPA) which is known to the State of California to cause birth defects or other reproductive harm. For more information go to https://www.p65warnings.ca.gov
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